Wednesday - Nov 29th, 2006
3:31 am
Uncategorized
(TORONTO) Borat Sagdiyev is learning a lesson many celebrities have learned before him: with superstardom comes trouble. The fake Kazakh documentarian,
the brainchild of British comic Sacha Baron Cohen, has faced a litany of
accusations since “Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit
Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan” hit theatres earlier this month to become one of
the top-grossing films of the year. And now he’s been cited as the reason
behind Hollywood’s latest high-profile split: the New York Post reported Tuesday
that Canada’s own Pamela Anderson is divorcing Kid Rock because of his angry
reaction to her scripted part in the film. More…
Kid Rock being dumped by Pamela Anderson because of his angry reaction to her scripted part in Borat film? Canadian alternative media have been running this story today. Frankly, we wonder if Pamela’s decision was driven by much more than “unfullfied desires” of approval from her new hubbie regarding her latest film debut. We suspect something else was lacking in the relationship.
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From CNN: 13,000 Palestinian security forces maintain cease-fire
Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas on Sunday ordered 13,000 security forces to deploy near the border to enforce a cease-fire agreement with Israel, sources in Abbas’ office told CNN.
The move came hours after Palestinian militants in Gaza apparently launched nearly a dozen rockets toward Israel.
Abbas also called on the Palestinian factions who previously negotiated the cease-fire to meet again to ensure the agreement holds, Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert told reporters Sunday.
The Israeli leader said his country will not take immediate action in the wake of the violations.
“Israel is a powerful country that can allow itself to show restraint and to give the cease-fire a chance to be fully implemented,” Olmert said.
Hamas’ militant wing and the Islamic Jihad militant group claimed responsibility for firing several rockets into Israel after the cease-fire took effect at 6 a.m. (11 p.m. ET Sunday).
In its leaflet, Islamic Jihad said it will “hold our right for resistance as long as Israel continues its aggression.”
[HatTip: C&F] The words “Cease Fire” and “Peace” have nothing at all in common with the agenda unfolding between Israel and it’s surrounding neighbors. In a word… its almost laughable if it wasn’t so tragic. Who can possibly take it seriously? Kofi Annan?
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Sunday - Nov 26th, 2006
2:01 pm
Uncategorized
Unconfirmed sources have linked the New Sony Play Station 3 to a surge in deadly violence. From the safety of the Camp David Holiday retreat President George W. Bush blasted Sony for the increasing body count linked to the new Play Station 3’s botched holiday launch. The President went of to demand that Sony take responsibility. “The death toll is staggering and the American people are demanding a new policy and new leadership.” In a statement released by Sony Japan, the maker of the Plays Station 3, expressed remorse at the tragic lose of human life. “Sony is shocked by the unfolding horrors but we feel the blame lies with George W. Bush and his failed Iraqi war policy. The Sony corporation can not be blamed for the wave of deadly sectarian violence unleashed in Iraq by the Bush administrations misadventure…”
With the situation in Iraq increasing unstable The Bush administration has turned to blaming others for the crisis. According to Juan Cole , noted middle East expert, The Bush administration has blamed Democrats, Iran, Syria, Osama Bin Laden and now the Sony Play station 3. After her middle east trip US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice linked the rise in violence to the launch of the Play Station 3 system. More…
[Satire] HatTip: Powering Satire: Sometimes we have to add this information because believe it or not some folks just can’t comprehend the concept of satire. — ed.
In deference to the deep philosophies presented in the new RFK movie, Bobby, it’s worth taking a look at Bush’s overall guiding philosophy:
Some men see things as they are and ask why?… I see things as they are and ask why not make them more fucked up? — Dubbya
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Saturday - Nov 25th, 2006
5:38 pm
Uncategorized
What do these folks know that the rest of us don’t? (Thank God!)
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New parody of “Bush, The Decider” that we all know and love. Hope you will enjoy. [HatTip: Mark Fiore]
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Wednesday - Nov 22nd, 2006
7:32 pm
Uncategorized
“Struggling to absorb his own abysmal approval ratings and the Republican party’s landslide defeat in the midterm elections, George W. Bush took another shot to the gut today when both birds designated by Bush as the National Thanksgiving Turkeys, refused the president’s ceremonial ‘pardon.’
‘Flyer’ and ‘Fryer’ who hail from the Lynn Nutt farm in Monett, Missouri, were formally pardoned by Bush in a ceremony today at the White House, marking the 59th anniversary of the Thanksgiving tradition.
But both white-feathered birds made it clear that they would refuse the president’s pardon, citing fundamental disagreements with Bush-administration policies and the legacy of last year’s pardon recipients, ‘Yam’ and ‘Marshmallow,’ who broke new ground in the turkey community by spurning Bush in 2005.
‘This wasn’t an easy decision. I mean, hey, I used to be a Republican,’ said a pugnacious Fryer in an interview on Tuesday evening. ‘But this guy Bush being both a Chickenhawk and a lame duck is an insult to all birds. Even turkeys have standards.’” More…
Dubbya and the turkey “evil doers”. A Brief History in Pictures…
The Commander-In-Chief in 2001… A foreshadowing of ominous events to come…
In 2002 the Secret Service keeps its distance, as the “Decider” moves in to interrogate the captured insurgent. GW approaches carefully. It’s possible a Micro-Martydom™ vest may be hidden away under those feathers somewhere. Stay Alert, because “I’ll be Back”!!
2003… Its a “kinder and gentler” GWB. (However we suspect the captured insurgent spent some in at Gitmo and was softened up, before the photo op. His head has turned blue from excessive water-boarding.)
Come 2004, Dick Cheney shows he is smart enough to keep his distance. (Shotgun not pictured in photo!)
Precious moments again in 2005 as Dubbya learns to become a dyed in the wool “Turkey Wisperer” and matches wits with the enemy in a desperate attempt at a Vulcan mind meld.
And like we said… In 2006 the Chief Executive has finally met his match. He has come full circle in this avian war on terror as the white feathered muhajadeen goes in for the kill in a symbolic gesture that seems to signal, “Isn’t it “time to pull out” Mr. President?” Gobble Gobble…
Any kind words for the First Lady on this fine Thanksgiving weekend?
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Wednesday - Nov 22nd, 2006
4:14 pm
Uncategorized
(WASHINGTON) — A day after the assassination of Lebanese Christian politician Pierre Gemayel, Democrats in the U.S. Congress called on President George Bush to pull U.S. troops out of Lebanon as a way of ending the strife that threatens to descend into civil war.
“As everyone knows,” said Rep. Jack Murtha, D-PA, a former Marine, “the American military is the cause of terrorism and sectarian tensions around the world. We can’t win in Lebanon, so we need to begin a phased redeployment immediately.”
Sen. John Kerry, D-MA, a professional Vietnam veteran, said, “There’s no reason that young American soldiers need to be going into the homes of Lebanese people in the dead of night terrorizing kids and children and women, breaking historical customs, religious customs. Lebanese soldiers should be doing that.”
The former Democrat presidential nominee added, “if American young people would study hard, do their homework and make an effort to be smart, they wouldn’t get stuck in Lebanon.”
House Speaker-elect Nancy Pelosi, D-CA, said the recent U.S. elections in which Democrats swept to a majority in the House and Senate, “were a mandate from the voters to get out of Lebanon and liberate those people from the oppression of the U.S. occupation that causes them to act out like this.”
Asked when the president would submit to the will of the people and pull the military from Lebanon, an unnamed White House spokesman said, “1984.”
In related news, Iran and Syria today offered to mediate the crisis by holding a summit meeting with the president of Lebanon and Hezbollah leader Sheik Hassan Nasrallah to discuss ways of preventing foreigners and Muslim fanatics from upsetting Lebanon’s natural state of peace and security.” -- as reported by satirical columnist Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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Wednesday - Nov 22nd, 2006
2:06 pm
Uncategorized
This past week paranoia once again struck the friendly skies as passengers aboard a U.S. Airways flight in Minnesota on its way to Phoenix Az freaked out at the sight of Imams in prayer! The incident began when a passenger handed a note to a flight attendant, expressing concern about the imams, and the attendant delivered the note to the pilot.
After a long delay, members of the U.S. Marshals Service boarded the plane, escorted the men off, handcuffed them and forced them to stand silently for about 45 minutes before they were detained and questioned by the FBI for nearly six hours.
After long deliberations with the FAA, TSA, CIA and AAA, the U.S. Domestic Airline Consortium arrived at the obvious and brilliant solution… Mecca Class™ …
(WASHINGTON) — In the wake of a civil rights crisis sparked when culturally-insensitive passengers on a U.S. Airways flight Monday became alarmed at the sight of six praying Muslim Imams, a consortium of major airlines has agreed to set aside Muslim prayer sections on all domestic and international flights.
“From now on, we devote our former first class sections to the use of our faithful, peaceful Muslim customers,” said an unnamed airline industry spokesman. “Most of the time, when a group of Muslim men suddenly stands up on an airplane chanting ‘Allahu Akbar’, they’re simply praying. Although the memories of 9/11 are still fresh in the minds of many Americans, if we’re going to heal those wounds, we need to move beyond religious intolerance.”
Flight attendants will alter their safety instructions to inform passengers that “seat cushions can be used as prayer mats,” and pilots will make every effort to point planes toward Mecca five times each day.
The industry source added, “We ask our devoted Muslim customers only to remember that all domestic flights are non-smoking, and we’d like to keep them that way.”” — Scott Ott / ScrappleFace
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Tuesday - Nov 21st, 2006
8:13 pm
Uncategorized
…With Democrats poised to assume control of Congress in January, Bush has substituted his charged campaign rhetoric with promises to cooperate in hopes of retaining legislative influence during the final two years of his presidency.
Major differences remain. Although Bush will contend with a Congress controlled by Democrats for the first time in his presidency, he has asked for passage of legislation authorizing wiretapping of phone calls of terrorism suspects. He has also sought confirmation of John Bolton as U.S. ambassador to the United Nations.
Many Democrats oppose the eavesdropping program and Bolton.
During the White House meeting, Reid made a pitch for the president to convene a bipartisan summit to devise a new policy for bringing stability to Iraq. The president listened but did not commit to such a summit, said Jim Manley, a spokesman for Reid.
In brief remarks to reporters after the meeting, Durbin noted the ties that Bush and Cheney wore.
“I do want to say thanks personally to the president and vice president for their conciliatory gesture by wearing blue ties today,” he said.
Bush said, “I was hoping you would notice, senator.” — Washington Post / Sat Nov. 11th
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Monday - Nov 20th, 2006
3:31 pm
Uncategorized
An ode to an oaf… or … Bush’s Brain on “Rove” … pick your poison
read more | digg story
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