(2007-07-05) — Al Gore, the concert organizer and former U.S. vice president, today defended his son, Al III, after the younger Gore’s arrest for speeding and drug possession, applauding his use of the hybrid Toyota Prius to offset the carbon emissions of his smoking marijuana.

“Even at 100 miles per hour,” said the elder Mr. Gore, “the Prius produces less deadly greenhouse gas than a Lincoln Navigator or a Hummer. While I don’t condone getting caught with marijuana, I would venture to say that my boy’s total carbon footprint is still substantially smaller than the median for his socioeconomic and age brackets.”

The former presidential candidate, still considered a possible contender for the 2008 Democrat nomination, is about to take center stage at the global LIVE EARTH concerts this weekend.

Mr. Gore helped organize LIVE EARTH to dramatize the plight of the planet by having hundreds of thousands of people burn millions of gallons of carbon-based fuel to travel to eight locations worldwide where they’ll communally exhale billions of cubic yards of carbon dioxide, generate hundreds of tons of human and artificial waste and expend untold kilowatt hours of electricity.

“People don’t realize how bad they are for the planet,” he said. “But when we’re all together at these concert locations, it will paint a picture of horrifying waste and environmental devastation. We’re hoping people will see it, wake up and say, ‘We have to stop doing this!’.” — as reported by Scott Ott / ScrappleFace

You have to hand it to Scott Ott. He wastes no time in connecting the dots when he sees an opportunity. While his article is satirical he illuminates the mystical paradox inherent in the mind of Al Gore, the “Man who would be President.” Mr. Gore is making every effort to exploit playing the “green card” in order to secure the “green” vote in his his quest for the keys to that obscene carbon neutral palace and lifestyle on Pennsylvania Ave. Let’s think for a moment. What if the planets did line up and he did win that brass ring next November? I wonder what that first energy renovation at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave would be?