Teacher’s Union Contributes to Drop Out Rates

Scott Ott spears the NEA for indirectly contributing to the high school drop out rate. The U.S. educational system is extremely sub par relative to other Western nations and getting worse. Mostly because of our arcane public school system which relies on a dysfunctional government and Congress to subsidize basic public education.

(WASHINGTON) – With a new study showing that more than 1-in-10 U.S. public high schools has a dropout rate of 40 percent or more, the National Education Association (NEA) today hailed its union members, “who work hard everyday in America’s highly-productive dropout factories.”

“We make a measurable difference in the lives of kids,” said an unnamed NEA spokesman. “On 1,700 dropout factory floors nationwide, our union strives to get the product out the door.”

The NEA source touted the results of a new Johns Hopkins University study, commissioned by the Associated Press, which shows that, nationwide, in 12 percent of secondary schools, “40 percent of our product makes it to the marketplace quickly, without the delay often caused by graduation requirements.”

As Congress prepares this week to put more money into the federal No Child Left Behind program, the NEA can boast that in states like South Carolina and Florida more than half of the schools have already achieved the coveted “dropout factory” status which qualifies them for a surge in federal funding.

“In previous generations,” the union source said, “It could take up to three years to move the product through the factory, and out the door with a diploma. We’ve found that if you focus on what logistics experts call ‘through-put’ and de-emphasize the diploma, you can get the product on the streets a lot faster.”

“While we’re particularly proud of our designated dropout factories,” he added, “let’s not forget that even the average public school has a 30 percent dropout rate, and our record of accomplishment with blacks and Hispanics is even more stunning.” — as reported by satirist Scott Ott / ScrpappleFace

Isn’t it nice to see our tax dollars alive and well contributing to failed programs like “No Child Left Behind” ?

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