Mike was going to be married to Karen so his father sat him down for a little chat. He said, "Mike, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother, and said, Here -try these on." She did and said, "These are too big. I can’t wear them."

I replied, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will."

Ever since that night, we have never had any problems.

"Hmmm," said Mike. He thought that might be a good thing to try. On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Karen, "Here – try these on." She tried them on and said, "These are too large. They don’t fit me."

Mike said, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will. I don’t want you to ever forget that."

Then Karen took off her pants and handed them to Mike. She said, "Here – you try on mine." He did and said, "I can’t get into your pants."

Karen said, "Exactly. And if you don’t change your smart-ass attitude, you> never will."

— [Hat Tip: megitt33]